We might call it having standards or “doing things right” but perfectionism at its core is the need to be or appear to be perfect or the belief that it is possible to achieve perfection. It is often viewed as a positive trait – in university I heard many people claim to be perfectionists with pride – but the truth is that this is a maladaptive strategy that will hold you back and wear your down over time because you constantly feel a need to be doing more and doing better.
Essentially, perfectionists run on the belief system that their value comes from their achievements.
I must profess that I too was once a perfectionist, but I didn’t know it. I did this by setting the bar impossibly high for myself during university. The expectation was that everything must be done to the best possible degree. I pushed myself to be the best student I could be, the best athlete for my sport, and even the best team player within the community. I received awards for this, but the emotional ROI was not what I anticipated that it would be. I eventually burned myself out and ended up compromising my performance in all areas as a result.
Being a perfectionist doesn’t necessarily mean you feel the need to be perfect. I didn’t. It shows up in many ways:
- Setting unrealistic expectations and goals for ourselves
- All-or-nothing thinking
- Getting defensive when receiving feedback
- Fear of failure
- Highly critical and judgemental of ourselves and others
- Results oriented
- Procrastination
It wasn’t until I found the Launchpad that I was able to see, understand, and change my own maladaptive strategies. As a result I now know how to find balance between work and play, the value my own feedback more than the feedback of others, be more compassionate with myself if I don’t hit a certain target, and most importantly my mental health has improved significantly from the time I was operating on those perfectionist strategies.
Do you resonate with any of this? Have you ever felt exhausted from how hard you’re pushing yourself? Do you often find you go all in or not at all? Are you highly critical of yourself?
If yes, then I urge you to check out our Launchpad Group Program that is starting in September. This is a 12-week online program that will take a deep dive exploration into the mindset strategies that are holding you back, so that we can deconstruct the broken patterns that are driving you into the brick wall and create new, sustainable strategies that will allow you to break through that glass ceiling!
This has truly been a life-changing program for me and for so many others.
You’re leaving valuable chips on the table if you don’t check it out!
– Coach Taylor