When was the last time you truly felt like you were in the present moment?
Think about the last time you were just sitting in one spot, whether it was with someone else or just yourself. Think about the last time that you weren’t glancing at your phone every couple minutes or so. Try to remember a time where you weren’t asking yourself… ‘what’s on my agenda tomorrow?’, ‘what needs to get done next week?’.
According to Reviews.org, “Americans check their phones 344 times per day” which equates to once every four minutes. The review also shows data that supports the fact that the majority of Americans also feel “uneasy leaving their phones at home” when they go out,”48% of people say they feel a sense of panic or anxiety when their cell phone battery goes below 20%”, “71% of Americans say they check their phones within the first 10 minutes of waking up”.
We have become addicted to being connected. And not just to other people. We have become addicted to being connected with our calendars, with our tasks, with the lives of other people, with the needs of other people. Why else would we be carrying our phones everywhere with us? We feel a need to stay connected with people who are not right in front of us.
So, I wouldn’t be surprised if a lot of people said they couldn’t remember the last time they truly felt present. I also wouldn’t be surprised if a lot of people found that moment immediately after either forgetting their phone somewhere or choosing to leave it behind. And I don’t mean to preach because I can’t say that I’m someone who chooses to leave their phone behind very often. Honestly, the reason for writing this was because I noticed myself getting sucked out of my own life and into the lives that lived on my phone–and with that, noticed a huge shift in my mood.
Instead of being present with my family, and with myself, I was worried about what was going on with someone else’s life–completely irrelevant to my own. That’s what happens when we fail to be present. We ruminate over the past and/or worry about the future–neither of which do any good for our current experience or wellbeing.
So, what to do about it? There’s so many different strategies but perhaps the first is to analyze the reason why you feel the need to escape your own current experience. What need does it serve to pull yourself away from the present in favour of any of the things we listed previously? Is there a gap in your ability to fill that need on your own because there is some sort of healing to be done? Is there something in your experience that you’ve been avoiding? Once you discover what that gap is, then it’s time to dive deep and do the work to find a way to address that need unmet.
And if that’s something you’re finding you need assistance with, you know where to find us!
– Coach Lauren