Self-care is a key component of high performance and the way that we get to it is by establishing boundaries. A boundary reinforces who you are and what you want to focus on and prioritize in life.
Most of us find it very challenging to set boundaries at work and at home because we have been socialized to be the good girl.
We learned how to get the approval of parents and teachers when we were young and this tends to carry forward into adulthood. We are set up to automatically be all things to everyone—the responsible and committed person—because we can handle it. We tell ourselves if we don’t do it, who will?
Lack of boundaries will always lead to burnout and inner conflict. How can we make time for what we need, whether it’s a walk with nature, meditation, time with friends who replenish us, or time alone with a book—when we neglect our own needs? This is why setting boundaries is the most important act of self-care.
While it feels difficult to set a boundary, it’s also hard NOT to set the boundary. Having our lives operating like a well-oiled machine should not come at the cost of our well-being.
Step one is accepting that this is an area that is fully within your control and so the mindset shift is recognizing that you are the only one who can be responsible for yourself and your needs in this way.